I wish I could say this has been the greatest time of my life and I was so busy having fun that I didn't have time to write.
That would be a lie.
I've actually spent that time being very lonely, very depressed, very sick and very angry.
Sometimes I think there isn't room enough in this house for both me AND Tony's over-inflated ego. He is a BEGINNER hypnotist. He's not been doing it long, but he thinks he's a fucking expert.
You know what? He can make me orgasm over and over with his voice, but after the sex, he's usually in a chat room bragging about himself (and all he'll really say to me is "I'm so awesome. What other man can do THAT to you?"...makes me sick.), leaving me feeling used and forgotten. He's not only not that great, he's quickly become the worst sex of my life, not because he's not good during sex, but because of how hurt I feel after it.
I'm trying so hard to be over him...In fact, I think I might be, but I'm so hung up on the idea that he was never in love with me, that he used me, that he was looking for an excuse to run away from his life in Georgia (all his words, not mine), It's hard to feel ok...
I wish just one person that I've fallen in love with would tell me they were in love with me... People either don't, or take it back.
*sigh*
Maybe my dad is right, maybe my standards are too high...But I'll be really upset if I'm really supposed to aim lower than this.
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